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Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Got To Give It Up


It's like a big party in my mind, and all the best thoughts are here!

Good Attitude and Optimism are always up for some fun.  Current Responsibilities and Timely Goals like to hang out together.  Emotional Growth loves to mingle. She is such easy company.

Things are going great, and we're having a blast.  That is, until Unaddressed Issues show up and spoil everything.  Oh sure, they may look harmless enough, sidling up to Fragile Ego and Self-Consciousness.  But those creeps cannot be trusted and nobody likes them.  Unaddressed Issues study the crowd, searching for an opportunity to weird everyone out.

Because these moments in time have already occurred, Unaddressed Issues generally behave as though no problems even exist.  "What do we give a shit? What's done is done," they snipe at the other guests, many of whom cannot easily forget the past.  Instead, they've chosen to ignore these unpleasant memories in hopes they'll just go away.  "So, we're cool, right?" a particularly obnoxious Unaddressed Issues slaps Emotional Growth across her ass.  Immediately, she starts to cry.

I grow weary of the way Unaddressed Issues carry on.  They ruin every party my brain throws.
When writing, I like how I get to choose the subject matter.  I go into my mind and select the thoughts that interest me most.  Often enough, the clever lines jockey into position confidently.  They are crowd pleasers, and they know it.  Quality jokes make the world a better place.

Mixing in the more serious concerns is challenging.  Revisiting memories that make me uncomfortable… Well, they just make me uncomfortable.  But I don't want to pretend they didn't happen, especially if there are lessons I can learn that make sense of the way I've behaved.

I see glimpses of myself in my sons.  I wonder why they feel and act the way they do.  Naturally, I wonder why I felt the way I did when I was their ages.  At ten and almost twelve, they seem to be handling their young lives quite well.  And I still have these questions that make me feel like a child.  But I am a grown woman.  I'm supposed to have the answers.  I'm their mother, for heaven's sake.  I want to prepare them for the world.

I don't know everything, but I am capable of learning.
And here is something valuable that I have learned.

When I tackle an unaddressed issue  in my life and examine why it plagues me, I can take responsibility for my role in the situation and try to explain my own actions to myself.  When I am honest, this unaddressed issue  can become an addressed issue, thus converting it into a non-issue.  That slot becomes available for a much more reasonable party guest.  The choice is mine.

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